Panhandler

Too funny.

Believable

Jumbo Roll

Saw this at work the other day in the men's room.



Cracked me up when I thought how big an ass do you have to have to need a roll of tp that big. Ah, cell phone cameras, they fill such an important need.

(Okay it's really a paper towel roll but it looked just like the big version of the regular roll it was sitting next to. Yeah I'm the big ass for posting this but it made me laugh, so what.)

One Hard Core Bunny

I prefer mine chocolate.

Feelin' Irish

Well we're heading into what may be a three day St Patrick's Day weekend.

One fine day in Ireland, a guy is out golfing
and gets up to the 16th hole. He tees up
and cranks one. Unfortunately, it goes into
the woods on the side of the fairway. He
goes looking for his ball and comes across
this little guy with this huge knot on his
head, and the golf ball lying right beside
him.

"Goodness," says the golfer, and proceeds to
revive the poor little guy. Upon awaking,
the little guy says, "Well, you caught me
fair and square. I am a leprechaun. I
will grant you three wishes."

The man says "I can't take anything from you,
I'm just glad I didn't hurt you too badly,"
and walks away.

Watching the golfer depart, the leprechaun
says "Well, he was a nice enough guy, and he
did catch me, so I have to do something for
him. I'll give him the three things that I
would want. I'll give him unlimited money,
a great golf game, and a great sex life."

Well, a year goes past (as they often do in
jokes like this) and the same
golfer is out golfing on the same course at
the 16th hole. He gets up and
hits one into the same woods and goes off
looking for his ball. When he
finds the ball he sees the same little guy
and asks how he is doing.
The leprechaun says, "I'm fine, and might I
ask how your golf game is?"
The golfer says, "It's great! I hit under
par every time."
The leprechaun says, "I did that for you. And
might I ask how your money
is holding out?"

The golfer says, "Well, now that you mention
it, every time I put my hand in my pocket, I
pull out a hundred dollar bill."

The leprechaun smiles and says, "I did that
for you, too. And might I ask how your sex
life is?"

The golfer looks at him a little shyly and
says, "Well, maybe once or twice a week."

The leprechaun is floored and stammers, "Once
or twice a week? Is that all?!"

The golfer looks at him and says, "Well,
that's not too bad for a Catholic priest in
a small parish."

More here
http://www.beaverislandrealty.com/html/st_pat.htm

Screw Grapefruit

Okay I cleaned it up a little. but oh so true.....



http://xkcd.com/388/

Actually I consider the tomatoes a veggie(a very tasty one) and the banana can go higher up.

Let Them Eat Cake!

While that famous phrase is wrongly unattributed to Marie-Antoinette the present day meaning is without doubt known to most. When our glorious commander GWB was asked the other day about gas costing $4 a gallon it became apparent that not only was he out-of-touch but also indifferent to the plight this presents to most of us. Dubba said it was "interesting". He jets around in a tax payer supported jet that eats more fuel per hour than most people will use in a year.



He should figuratively have been given the same treatment as that met by the former queen of France.

What News?

So much time until the actual election. So many talking heads. So little to talk about.
The pundits are going on and on today because HC threw a lawyer qualifier in after saying she didn't believe Obama was a muslim. Obama states he prays to Jesus every night. Sheeeeeesh. Any chance we could talk of the economy or taxes or the price of gas?

Gloria Steinem makes stupidest comment of the week by imagining what if John McCain had been Joan.

Jack Nicholson has assembled some of his more famous film roles into a video clip endorsing Hillary. Aren't most of these characters psycopaths?



I may be insane by November. I may be now.